Most people would say
that I'm a little weird, and slightly unpredictable. However there is one
entity that has the ability to predict certain things about me to a tee. And
while most people look down on big brother practices of big businesses, I love
them when they are used to benefit my life, nah, make my life so convenient
that I don't even have to consider trivial things like what cravings I am going
to have on my period. It's a beautiful thing when you can walk into your
neighborhood CVS buy a bottle of water, and upon cashing out you receive an
extra care coupon for not just Tampax brand tampons, but Nabisco Oreos, and
diet coke.
Now this fact by its
self is pretty phenomenal when it happens the first time. I got excited when I
realized that I was due for my period in just a few days, and did not in fact
have any tampons at home, nor did I have any Oreos since I polished off my last
package last month when Aunt Flow visited. It became like a monthly Christmas
when it started happening every month. Now I know what you are thinking, that's
kinda creepy that CVS is so in tune with your cycle, but this is hardly the
creepiest thing that these companies keep track of, in an article for the New
York Times Charles Duhigg wrote about how target can pin point female customers
who are pregers with in their first trimester.
Now I can certainly see the
implications and possibilities of disaster for companies being so in tune with
our shopping habits. But I can't help but be torn between the convince of not
having to keep track of when my period is coming, and CVS somehow being able to
jack the price of Oreos on me every month the week before I become a complete
emotional wreck, irrational psychopath. However I bet if this does happen some
point in the future and some sorry soul gets stuck in my cross hairs, Law and
Order could write a great episode where the base my entire defense on me being
a victim of corporate greed, and that I was manipulated by big brother, and
then McCoy goes after a fictional general pharmacy for multiple murders
involving menstrual women in the tri-state area.
Does it make me a
horrible person to think that if I do in fact lose my cool that this would be
the most desirable outcome? From prison me and Delilah, my "cell
mate" would host a viewing party in the clink library with a few of our
closest friends and guards, for my L&O episode, and "I" would be
played by some mild-mannered yet adorable actress, I'm thinking Zooey
Deschenel, or Rashida Jones, both of which I think have the right level of
quirkiness to effectively capture special bit of odd...
But I digress, according
to CVS though, as of August 12 I have saved a total of $74.18 dollars, over 1/4
of what I have actually spent at the store that year ($277.85) not to shabby,
regardless of the prying eyes in my shopping bag.
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